Wrong Time For A Keg Stand
Written by: SmokesAlot
I went to a 7 kegger, after probably 4 gallons of beer and some jager, I decided its KEG STAND TIME, which was a bad enough idea since I was too shitfaced to even sit right, but that's beyond the point, right before I did the keg stand I smoked a blunt then decided, ok, now's the time if any. As my friends hoisted all 185 pounds of my ass on top of the keg, I started chugging, this went on for awhile (or so I'm told) then all of a sudden a knock at the door, I figure it was another person to party, so I kept chuggin, someone answered the door and had 2 mag lights shining into their faces, right as that happens, 4 cops hop the fence in the backyard and start tackling the fleeing kids.
I'm in the back of the house guzzling beer with my friends, when I hear someone scream, "COPS, GET THE FUCK OUTA HERE!!" My friends immediately drop me, I was literally halfway to the floor and my friends were no were to be seen, the cops turn the corner, I have beer dripping from my face, and just say "shit, I need a cig" and sit down to have my cig, knowing I was caught. They went through the normal bullshit of giving me tickets for: underage consumption, underage possession of tobacco, and drunk in public tickets. The cops decide im a little to intoxicated, so as they started handcuffing me, I flip out cuz im drunk, and elbow the cop in the face, right when that happens, I get slammed to the pavement by 4 cops. Bleeding, I get tossed in a squad car still kicking and flailing. I was then charged with assault of a police officer, and resisting arrest. But thank god im a minor and the judge knew me (in a friendly way) so I got away w/ fines and probation.
That was one hell of a night... oh ya, I passed out in my holding cell too, it was pretty funny... when I took the breathalyzer, I blew a 2.7... MY HIGHEST SCORE YET!
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